Ding Dong the Witch is Dead!

I am officially terrible at keeping this updated, and due to lack of time or patience, I'm going to give up on any chronology or logic and write whatever.

1. The most important piece of news: I moved! My homestay was not ideal. I had requested a big, kind family with kids and pets who likes to talk a lot, joke around, and spend quality family time together. They gave me a cranky fifty-something year old woman who lives alone and does not possess the ability to smile. Needless to say, it was not ideal. From the start she had no desire to chat. I suppose it was all for the better, because I could not understand a word she said. She scowled and yelled all the time, and mocked me for not knowing how to do simple things like using the microwave or peeling oranges (which she interpreted was the case).. My imperative tense is great now, because that was all she said to me. She would criticize every thought or action displayed, yell everything, and generally make me uncomfortable. Our biggest discrepancy was about shoes. She was convinced that I was going to get sick all the time. I managed to shake her off until it started raining every day. I came unprepared in the shoe department. Due to issues involving toes and elastic, I pretty much have one pair of [very un-waterproof] shoes. They got soaked walking home through the rain one night. For the next several days, I had to keep wearing them. It was not ideal, but I layered on the socks and avoided additional puddles. She was severely opposed to this. I was getting ready to leave once, and went to the laundry room to retrieve my damp shoes. She entered the kitchen and cornered me in the laundry room. She was full out yelling that I could not leave the house without dry shoes. Explaining that I had no others did not help, and I had to actually sort of push her aside to get out of the house, and I was still late. She also refused to believe that it is literally impossible to buy size 10 (42) shoes in Spain. That would have been the obvious solution, but it is literally impossible. It got to the point where I felt physically uncomfortable when I heard her keys in the door, and I would hide in my room. She basically has no manners or heart, and would respond to my cheerful "Buenos dias, Maria Jose!" or "Buenas noches!" with more yelling.

Anyway, I talked to the homestay coordinator, who had fabulous news. A girl had just moved out of her house because she was allergic to cigarette smoke. This left an opening in a family with a mom, dad, eight-year-old daughter, and puppy. They had had fourteen students before me, and had all good evaluations. The one downfall is that they smoke in the house, but there's no way I'm going to avoid smoke in this city. I went to meet them last Monday, and moved in on Wednesday. They are an absolute dream come true. It is almost amusing how perfect they are, and how much they match my request. Right when I got there to first meet them, the eight-year-old, Esperanza, took me by the hand to show me the pretty, homey, house. The adorable little black puppy, Belí, jumped up, allowing me to feel THE softest ears in the world. We sat in the living room to talk. Some highlights:
1. Esperanza snuggled up, pulling my arm around her
2. The dog lay down on my feet
3. The dad, Carlo, told me that they joke around alllll the time, and I hope that's okay
4. Carlo also said that I should get used to constant singing
5. I can understand their Spanish! I understand everything that Esperanza says, most of what Carlo says, and slightly less, but still a lot, of what Carmen says.
6. Esperanza told me the one rule of the house: I can come in drunk at 5:00 AM if I want, but I can't bring guys home then because the other bedrooms are very close.
7. They have a camper van and they go to the beach a lot of weekends once it gets warm.
8. Esperanza has a boyfriend picked out for me! She asked if I have one, I said no, but told her that I'd like a Spanish boyfriend, so if she has anyone in mind she should let me know. She promptly told me about her tall, dark, handsome 21-year-old student teacher.

It's been a few days now, and remains totally great. I have to FIGHT Esperanza to leave the house. She literally throws me down on my bed to do my hair and makeup for me, and to put every piece of jewelery that I brought on me. She has had fifteen college girls in her house during her whole life, so she knows the drill. Carmen and Carlo are more like roommates than parents ("Quiero ser tu amiga mejor. No soy una 'senora,' solo tengo 37 anos!") They let me stop eating when I'm full, wear whatever the hell shoes I want, and spend time outside. As you may imagine, the old house was getting me down, so generally speaking everything has gotten better since moving. I'm happy, I'm not lonely, I don't live in fear, and I've exercised my laughing muscles.

Through Skyping home, checking facebook, writing this, and talking to two other friends abroad I've been at this internet cafe for three hours, so I'm going to head home. More to come soon, I promise!